Don't Let It Go: Why Forgetting Is Dangerous

Happy New Year

New year, new beginnings.

Moving forward is awesome. Setting goals is fantastic. In fact, I have my New Year’s goal set—super cliche: get fit again! Hopefully, I manage it!

For many people, New Years is a time of letting go of the past, and moving forwards. Letting go of things can be useful, of course. But what happens when we equate “let it go” with ignoring and forgetting our past?

Both personally and collectively, this “fresh start” mentality can be dangerous.

Why Personal Memory Matters

Remembering my dark side—how I acted when I was driven by jealousy, envy, anger, contempt, or pain—enabled me to understand and accept myself better. To improve communication with my loved ones.

Remembering how people mistreated me enabled me to analyze that behavior and better protect myself.

If I had just “let it go” and “moved on” without processing?

I would have repeated the same patterns. Hurt the same people in the same ways. Let the same people hurt me again and again.

Understanding my past gave me the tools to change my future.

Why Collective Memory Matters

The same is true for nations.

It starts in our schools. I remember my history classes growing up—painfully boring. We learned dates and events. That was it. No analysis of WHY people behaved the way they did.

We memorized the dictionary without ever learning to have the conversation.

But here’s the thing: We ARE shaped by our history whether we study it or not.

I grew up in 1990s Eastern Europe—in the chaos of post-Soviet transition, surrounded by wars and conflicts. The Kosovo War. The Albanian unrest. Perestroika’s aftermath. That shaped me in a very different way than growing up in 1990s Paris or Berlin would have.

Geopolitics affects us all.

Now I watch current events—Venezuela, conflicts around the world—and I see the same patterns. Because I lived through similar chaos. Because I remember.

The Cost of Forgetting

When nations refuse to remember their history, they make it easier for those patterns to repeat.

And who pays the price? Ordinary people caught in the middle.

When you don’t understand how power works, how manipulation happens, how propaganda spreads—you can’t protect yourself.

The same way individuals who refuse to process their past end up repeating their patterns—nations that refuse to remember their history are doomed to repeat it.

What We Should Do Instead

So this New Year’s, yes—set your goals. Move forward. Get fit. Chase your dreams.

But don’t forget where you’ve been.

Personally: Reflect on your patterns. What worked, what hurt, what you want to change. Understand your past so you can actually transform your future.

Collectively: Learn your history. Not just the dates, but the WHY. The patterns. How power works. How ordinary people get caught in the middle.

Understanding doesn’t mean dwelling. It means learning.

Remembering doesn’t mean staying stuck. It means moving forward with wisdom instead of ignorance.

Both personally and collectively, our past defines us—consciously and subconsciously.

The question isn’t whether it shapes us. The question is: Do we understand HOW it shapes us?

Because that understanding is the difference between repeating our mistakes and actually learning from them.

That’s the real fresh start. Not forgetting. Understanding.

Happy New Year. Remember your past. Shape your future.

Read more:

Christmas and the Pressure to Be Happy

The Emotional Intelligence We Never Learned (But Can Still Master)

“But You Don’t Look Sick”: The Invisible Violence of Everyday Ableism